I stood
there as I watched my husband drive away. I had a worried, puppy face look that
made him feel guilty and sad for leaving me behind. But he couldn’t wait more
with random cars honking from behind. I was secretly hoping he’d abandon his
plan to drive back home and stay with me for one more day in this big city of
Frankfurt. We’d arrived in Frankfurt two days ago, on a rainy evening.
Everything looked so gloomy and dull, it got me more worried. “How am I going
to live alone here?” I asked myself and my husband, who had been my only friend, my parent, my everything in this new country, for the first time that day
and perhaps for the 20th time that week as I looked at the tall
structures, the museums, that lined the city. I’d never lived alone, not even
in my own country! My husband gave me a reassuring look for the nth time: YOU’LL DO FINE.
Hmph.
I crossed the street and looked above at the
building where I was going to study for the next one month, I looked around and
saw some old buildings that surrounded the tallest sky-scrapper of the city.
Old world charm with a hint of modernity. Interesting. I reached the floor and
was greeted by the receptionist, Selem, with a warm smile who ushered me in to
the class where my other peers were already waiting. Everybody exchanged
smiles, introduced themselves. Two Germans and rest all from different parts
of the world, some of them teachers already, others aspiring to be one. Then walked in the tutors: Edna, Antony and Graham. All three of them had their own
distinct personalities. There was something about them that made them intriguing. We had a fun, very offbeat ice-breaking session, which resulted in all the classmates getting acquainted well with each other. On my way back to the apartment, nervousness gave way to excitement.
It was a hectic month. I was mentally drained. So much to process, study, learn and teach. Assignment, submissions, teaching, learning, assimilating and so much more... everything at the same time. I had mentally prepared myself for this, I had been already informed about the demanding nature of this course by the administrator and a friend of mine. Yet, there were times when I felt so overwhelmed by the course. It was all a very different experience for me, I had never lived alone in my own country, and here I was in Frankfurt, the skyscraper city of Germany, living alone. Even if it was for a month. But that month was a good teacher. I learnt to deal with circumstances alone. Earlier I had my father to depend on, bail me out and now it was my husband. But here I was alone. It took me a while to get used to life like this, but eventually I started enjoying it. Like my husband pointed out, how many girls get a chance like this, especially after marriage and how lucky I was. He encouraged me to be courageous and be more outgoing. And my rock of Gibraltar of a husband was always there, every weekend to take me out for some city excursion, fancy dates at times and doing random things like riding an e-bike to the city center, shopping and the best thing that he did without fail was- cook for me before he left for home. So that I was well fed and did not have to worry about cooking.
But it was the course that kept me so busy and occupied that I hardly had time in hand. I went back to studying, that I missed dearly. Not just the living alone bit, but the whole experience of getting to study in a setup that was a complete opposite of how I studied back home in India. I enjoyed, savoured every bit of it. I tried to absorb and make notes of everything that those amazing set of tutors taught. It took me a while to get used to the fact that I had to address the tutors by their names and not 'Sir' or 'Ma'am' like I did back home. Initially, I could not bring myself to go and talk to them, the way my peers did. Soon inhibitions gave way to confidence, and there were times when in our little free time I found myself talking to them, sharing my experiences of teaching and learning in India and they shared their experiences, their love for Indian food. Today when I teach, I feel a strong sense of gratitude towards my trainers when I apply their methods of teaching and see the students reciprocate it positively.
I cannot possibly enlist all the highlights of the course but one that will remain etched forever in my mind would be the conversation I had with Kirstin, a middle-aged high school teacher from Black Forest, Germany. We both stood in the balcony of the school and spoke for an hour. She spoke about her experiences as an exchange student in Russia and how the experience enriched her and changed her outlook towards her teaching and life in general. Her experiences as a teacher, about her education and I shared with her how shifting to Germany initially had been overwhelming and so different, though I had prepared myself mentally, my experiences as an exchange student in Münster, Germany. We spoke about so many things but what left me intrigued after the conversation was the fact that I could speak in lengths to a woman who was double my age, but could actually understand me, my ambitions for my career and share her insights and some career advice. I will cherish that conversation all throughout my life.
My heart felt heavy towards the end of the course. Frankfurt had been such an amazing teacher. Perhaps the best experience of my life, that taught me so much in so little time. CELTA made me a better teacher for sure, but the whole experience of living in Frankfurt made me a more confident person. And my husband who just believed in me, and trusted me when I myself didn't feel I was capable enough to pull it off😊
